Happy Veterans Day!🇺🇸🥀


I want to say THANK YOU for serving to all my fellow vets who gave their all when they were asked to do so.

During my time in the military, I served onboard a nuclear ballistic missile submarine for my entire enlistment. I completed 8 Strategic Deterrent Patrols of 110 days each at a time when transgender people were not even a consideration in the U.S. military…and it was obviously before my own transition.


But nevertheless, this woman served deep under the North Atlantic and even deeper within her own closet in what was an all male world of the Submarine Force.

When you hear the anti LGBT hate filled rhetoric coming out of the Trump/Pence administration, just remember that thousands of gay and trans women and men have already served honorably. We were there doing our duty for years while elitists, such as the current president and vice president, served only themselves and their political aspirations.

Sadly, we served whle hiding our own gender identities and sexual preferences.

We used to say, “Pride runs deep” in the submarine force…and it really, really does. Pride in being who you are runs even deeper.


Take a moment to remember all our vets but especially those members of our community who continue to fight just to be recognized.
Toni Grace 🇺🇸🏳️‍🌈🕊

#veterans #transgender #lgbtq #Toni-Grace

Holy Google!!!

So I’m always Googling stuff…partially because I’m curious about everything and anything and partially because I’m lazy…gigglez👯🏼‍♀️

So I decided to Google myself today not knowing what I’d find. I actually did an image search for “Toni Grace transgender” … and OMG!
I was blown away! Lets just say that my digital footprint is a size huge!!!! This is page one!

So much for anonymity and a low key coming out to the world! Now if I could only get a royalty check for these I’d be living large!
Toni Grace🏳️‍🌈




I get labeled all the time. It used to bother me when people did that because I always thought it was a simplistic way for people to try to categorize what really is a mosaic of so many different qualities … both good and not so good.

This latest one fits like a glove…it makes me dangerous, unpredictable and yes…

1. eager, headlong, impulsive. Refers to persons who are hasty and precipitate in action, or to actions not preceded by thought. Impetuous suggests eagerness, violence, rashness: impetuous vivacity; impetuous desire; impetuous words….☠
Wear your label with pride!

Toni Grace🐅

Question: Does the status of your sexual partner as transgender or CIS establish whether or not the sex act is straight or gay? Please be honest👧🏼


 I was doing some reading yesterday and I came across a discussion that I found interesting.

The question asked was, “If I’m a genetic man and I have sex with a trans woman would that be considered gay sex?

If I’m a trans female and I have always preferred sex with females (CIS and Trans) am I a lesbian?

I have very firm opinions on the matter but I wanted to get your opinions. There is no “right or wrong” answer just as there is no correct answer to the question of “Do you identify your own gender as male or female.”

I want to open a dialog on this as it speaks volumes on our perception of ourselves, our partners and our perception of the human sexual condition.

Toni Grace🦋

OK… Here’s the deal

🏳️‍🌈 Conservative politicians are trying to erase transgender people from existence. The Trump / Pence administration is actively and forcefully pursuing a policy of redefining male and female regardless of whether you have undergone hormone therapy, SRS surgery and state recognized document amendment (Drivers license, birth certificate, Social Security etc.)

🏳️‍🌈 In other words, regardless of what efforts you’ve made to tranistion … you’ll be redefined right back to your perceived birth sex at the stroke of a pen.

🏳️‍🌈 For me, personally, that means that the government will designate me as male:
🦋Despite the medical profession’s determination that I am female,
⚘Despite bottom surgery,
🌼Despite years of HRT,
🍁 Despite legal documentation and legal affirmations of my female gender
🌹Despite years of therapy
🐞Despite the State of Connecticut’s affirmation of my female gender
🕊…and most importantly to me, despite all the hurt, pain, sacrifice, hate, trauma and fear that we as transgender people have endured to simply be accepted as who we are.

You don’t have to be trans and you don’t have to be LGBTQ to be a loving and accepting person. You do have to think logically. You do, however, have to open your heart and mind to acceptance of trans people as human beings of value and worth. You only have to reject hate and embrace empathy.

Toni Grace

#trans #midterm #hate #politics #lgbtq #Trump #Pence #rights



“Coming Out”
We in the LGBTQ community often talk about coming out.
You’ll hear someone say, “I came out to my family” or “I came out to a friend at work”. Its often a hard thing to do and it can be a stressful and challenging time for everyone involved.

I’m a lesbian and most everyone in my life know that I am. There are of course people that I would never bother disclosing my sexual orientation to. Like I don’t go up to the mailman, the cashier at the supermarket or my neighbors and say, “Hi, remember me….I’m Toni and I’m gay!”

That allows me discretion and a degree of privacy. BUT I’m also a transgender woman who is post operative and living as a woman 24hrs a day. So my coming out as trans is not something I really have to tell anyone who has eyes….and that’s where it gets interesting.

Remember I mentioned the mailman and the cashier at the supermarket? Well I saw these people every day for years when I presented as a male and one day…POOF…now they see a woman standing in front of them! Awkward? Yeah…a bit!

There are dozens of people who knew me as Tony 👦🏼who have since gotten to know me as Toni👱🏻‍♀️ and each time they witnessed the “new me” it was a “coming out” whether I wanted to or not. I’ve come out so many times I’ve lost track and chances are, Ill be coming out to other people for years.

So while I respect and celebrate my gay brothers and my lesbian sisters for their courage in coming out…its not quite the same for Trans people who actually transform their physical body and gender.

A lesbian woman, who is CIS, does not wake up with a big “L” on her forehead and the choice to disclose her status remains a choice. Not so with trans women and men.

So just some food for thought for my sisters who are in the process of “coming out”. Keep in mind that while the first person you come out to will be a HUGE event and is unbelievably affirming …you’ll be repeating that disclosure to every single person you previously knew before you transitioned.

Stay strong and stay real!
Toni Grace 🕊